i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize