i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
It's rum buckets o'clock
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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