Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
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