i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize