gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
