Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
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And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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