apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize
