pop tarts are not kleenex
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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