Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
