I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize
