slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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