Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
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