whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
