Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize