So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Randomize
