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• (636): View more from Missouri

  12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.

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• (646): View more from New York

  I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.

  (347): View more from New York

  And what brought this epiphany?

  (646): View more from New York

  I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..

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  19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (970): View more from Colorado

  totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.

  (1-978): View more from Massachusetts

  Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.

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• (716): View more from New York

  I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.

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  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (702): View more from Nevada

  There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.

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• (865): View more from Tennessee

  I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend

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• (540): View more from Virginia

  I need Jameson.

  (240): View more from Maryland

  Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.

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• (704): View more from North Carolina

  We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.

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• (585): View more from New York

  I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun

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• (360): View more from Washington

  Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .

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