I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
