Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
