I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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