they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
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