maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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