U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
