i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
