the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
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