Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
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