dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Randomize
