Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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