I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
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