Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(908): View more from New Jersey

I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'

(1-603): View more from New Hampshire

that's awkward

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(614): View more from Ohio

Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?

(1-614): View more from Ohio

condoms and good judgment

(614): View more from Ohio

Can I buy both of those at the same store?

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??

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(804): View more from Virginia

i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.

(804): View more from Virginia

i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.

(786): View more from Florida

that would mean it's on tape

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(615): View more from Tennessee

At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...

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(716): View more from New York

"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless

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