This dress was meant to end up on your floor
I wish you could order shots online.
the day after is always just damage control
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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