Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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