Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Randomize
