omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting married
To pizza
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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