If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
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I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
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WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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