Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
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