Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB