Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
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grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Verdict: uncircumcised.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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