She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
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