Texts From Last Night

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  (206): View more from Washington

  It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.

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  (206): It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts. http://tfl.nu/etp3
  Replies (1) Good night (748) Bad night (980)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  I want to walk on stilts...naked

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  (970): I want to walk on stilts...naked http://tfl.nu/tpp3
  Replies (14) Good night (1866) Bad night (520)
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell

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  (856): a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell http://tfl.nu/7uki
  Replies (9) Good night (1392) Bad night (2168)
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  (316): View more from Kansas

  Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range

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  (316): Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range http://tfl.nu/j5nd
  Replies (11) Good night (898) Bad night (2366)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.

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  (401): I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths. http://tfl.nu/qww0
  Replies (37) Good night (1040) Bad night (2364)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.

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  (816): We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs. http://tfl.nu/qooi
  Replies (24) Good night (4668) Bad night (887)
• Favorite

  (334): View more from Alabama

  you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?

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  (334): you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that? http://tfl.nu/908j
  Replies (38) Good night (1471) Bad night (3381)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?

  (573): View more from Missouri

  pat the guy you slept with

  (314): View more from Missouri

  still need a last name

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  (314): hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this? (573): pat the guy you slept with (314): still need a last name http://tfl.nu/e97s
  Replies (53) Good night (10678) Bad night (1767)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?

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  (612): I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life? http://tfl.nu/j7qa
  Replies (6) Good night (2016) Bad night (1117)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko

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  (814): we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko http://tfl.nu/v0ui
  Replies (18) Good night (4090) Bad night (981)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"

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  (513): I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem" http://tfl.nu/bkek
  Replies (4) Good night (1963) Bad night (775)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?

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  (703): Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch? http://tfl.nu/5l5a
  Replies (7) Good night (879) Bad night (1222)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  You texted me a picture of your face along with #help

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  (410): You texted me a picture of your face along with #help http://tfl.nu/jxdb
  Replies (2) Good night (769) Bad night (404)
• Favorite

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus

  (1-306): View more from Saskatchewan

  you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.

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  (306): I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus (1-306): you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now. http://tfl.nu/txg4
  Replies (3) Good night (290) Bad night (655)
• Favorite

  (469): View more from Texas

  I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.

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  (469): I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray. http://tfl.nu/wtqa
  Replies (2) Good night (681) Bad night (178)

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