ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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