that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
