it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
