Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
