Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
