Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize