R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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