Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
