she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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