Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
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