carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
Acid is not a monday night drug
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Randomize
