How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize