Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Randomize