"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
