Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
